Monday, 8 September 2014

I've never blogged about this before

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I think about it more often than I let myself say it out loud. But it's real and I think about it a lot.

I watched two lovers hold hands this past weekend and it hit me as their fingers connected, as their fingers fit that falling in love should be as easy as that grip. I want love like that.

In the same weekend, I watched someone weep with grief only a nasty breakup could bring. It was deep, heavy and even I got a little teary-eyed. And it made me a little more hesitant about the whole love affair.

So, yes, as you've probably already guessed, I don't blog about relationships often because, well, I suck at them. The longest relationship I've been in lasted a year (and that was probably because it was long distance) You don't give some one advice about something when you're floundering yourself, right?

Today I don't have solutions, I'm simply posing questions.

How do two very different people fall (literally) in love with each other without rubbing each other raw?

And how is it that we get our hearts broken and are willing to be smitten again by another person when he/she walks down the block?

Where love is concerned, I'm a natural 'quitter'. My motto is walk out before you're walked out on because past experiences have been less than pleasant. But I'm growing and I guess when you're growing you learn that being in a relationship doesn't mean your partner will never hurt you and you don't have to obsess about that because it will inevitably happen. Also, you will hurt your partner. Sometimes, on purpose. Other times, maybe not. It's a side effect of being awkward and imperfect humans.

Forgive me if today's post doesn't make a lot of sense, they are the early Monday morning thoughts of a girl who (though she hesitates) wants to tumble into someone, a girl who wants to laugh and have no loneliness fall out.

1 comment:

  1. Marriage is by no means a cake walk, but when marriage becomes a tool to be used for self satisfaction that we often term "love", it's easy to walk when it doesn't satisfy US anymore