Monday, 17 November 2014

Strip blogging: how much is too much?


The title of this post is a tad misleading, sorry not sorry I had to get your attention from the start.
I'm not talking about what people wear while they tap away at the keyboard or what they don't wear as they upload photos of themselves online. It's a little more basic than that.


It's about the struggle to be authentic especially as a lifestyle blogger. Nobody has the patience for journals or a diary these days. (The last time I had it, my step mom found it and I got a good beating when my dad got back home). There's a certain joy that comes with blogging about life experiences knowing that someone reading can connect and you're not alone. It's comforting to blog about a meltdown then have people say "me too! Thank you for sharing your story". Well, for a minute it is but after that you have to shut your laptop and face the fact that you just blogged a very dark and personal experience. I've seen bloggers delete their blogs because of the ammunition they gave internet trolls through what they had blogged. It's real out here and though there will be supportive readers online and in your real life, there are also people that genuinely do not care about you. There's not much you can do about that but you sure can decide to not hand them  bullets and a Glock.

When there's major stuff going on in my life and I'm tempted to "put it all out there" there's that tiny voice of reason that says "Maybe not, Ibukun". It's not being fake, it's not about projecting a perfect life online (um, I don't have one), it's highlighting the many good times and downplaying the bad times. When I do blog about bad or very personal things, I only do so after I've processed things alone and I try to put a bigger focus on what I've learned than on the pain. People take photos at parties, grad ceremonies, baby showers, weddings because they want to remember the good for as long as possible. It's just human nature. It's also human nature to want to talk about problems with people and connect with them. Even though it's 2014 and it seems everything and everyone is online, maybe we really should pick up the phone, call up a trusted friend or therapist and talk. Not blog. Not tweet. Not Instagram. Not tumblr. At least not when emotions are high and you're still in the thick of it. When you do blog about it, let it be a summary and what you learned from it. The whole world doesn't have to know the grisly details

Just my two cents.

What are your thoughts: how much is too much to share online?

8 comments:

  1. cassandra ikegbune17 November 2014 at 04:53

    I totally agree. It happens to me too , the 'maybe not Cassandra" but I still share personal experiences and I always make it about the lessons and the break through

    www.cassiedaves.com

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  2. There's not much you can do about that but you sure can decide to not hand them bullets and a Glock.


    Wise words. Thanks for giving me something to think about!

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  3. Thanks for this post Ibukun
    I agree that it should be a summary and lessons learnt but even at that there are some things I still cant share
    When I started taking my blog seriously I read a post advising to be clear on the things I would never share on the internet and that has helped a lot to be transparent with the rest of it.


    xx

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  4. Yes to this!

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  5. So glad it resonated with you. Thanks for dropping by, Brenda! Hope you stick around. Xx

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  6. That sounds like a brilliant idea! Some things should stay off the internet completely. Thanks for dropping by , Kunmi! :*

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  7. Hello Ibukun,
    You do have a great personality. I am still going through your blog (got the link from the 4cs chic group on facebook) and I totally love it (clean, aesthetic, authentic). I just started blogging and I have had to scrap some of my jottings and tell myself that not everything is *bloggable*. Believe it or not, I have been tempted over and over again to rant, to share what should only be spoken with friends and it does take a lot of discipline. I am gradually getting the hang of it. Great Post! Please do check out my blog - http://www.radmusings.com.
    :D

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  8. Your blog is so nice! Keep at it and i'm sure you'll do great things. Thank you for your kind words and for dropping b . You pretty much made my day!

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